


Redemption

by tekowrites



Category: Young Avengers
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Angst, Break Up, Cheating, Jealousy, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Second Chances
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-02
Updated: 2013-05-02
Packaged: 2017-12-10 05:23:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 21,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/782300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tekowrites/pseuds/tekowrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU where Billy is 21 years old, bitter, and hasn’t seen Teddy since they were sixteen.</p><p>After the break-up, Billy becomes a liability to the Young Avengers’ team, and is put out of commission. He’s a senior in college, and works part time as a lifeguard. His life is boring, and filled with regrets. Billy tries to marshal on, only to find that Teddy is back, and wants to be part of his life again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I blame this on Thomas Newman’s Angels in America Soundtrack.

It was an ugly break up, and what made it worse, was that 5 years later, Billy still had no idea who the real person behind the breakup was. All he can remember now are the words, the hurt, the screaming and that moment when Teddy walked out.

_“Why? Why can’t you tell me why you’re leaving?” Billy kept searching Teddy’s eyes for answers, but it was like looking at a different person, Teddy wouldn’t meet his eyes._

_“It’s complicated. Billy I-shit, I made a mistake and now I need to take care of them.”_

_“Them? Who are you talking about? Teddy. Teddy_ please _, I can help, just tell me what it is. Whatever it is, we can fix it. Just tell me!” He almost clawed at Teddy’s arm to get him to listen, to change his mind. Why was he leaving?_

_“You wouldn’t understand, Billy you’d just rush into things, and I can’t afford to do it this time. Not until he grows up.”_

_“Teddy you’re not making any sense. I can help, I won’t rush I promise, just please don’t go. Who? Who grows up? If you’d just tell_ me _.”_

_Teddy just shook his head, and pushed Billy’s hands away, and Billy kept trying to grab him, to touch Teddy and get some sense into him. “My son.”_

_Billy froze. His entire body going cold with shock, his fingers trembling a little. He tried to reach out for Teddy, but his arms fell short, it was as if his entire energy had been spent. “Teddy? Teddy, no.” He didn’t even notice that he was shaking his head._

_Billy moved closer, dragging his feet behind him in the effort to reach Teddy and when he was near enough, Teddy wouldn’t look into his eyes. He turned and gave him his back, folding his hands on his chest so Billy couldn’t reach for them._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_“Sorry?” Billy repeated the word in his mind, sorry? Was he sorry he was leaving, or that he’d made up such an obvious lie? “Teddy I won’t..” he swallowed, his mouth was dry, “I won’t get mad, please just..” just not that._

_Teddy shook his head again and wouldn’t explain. Billy could feel the hurt rising in his chest, but then anger, fury was setting in._

_“Why are you lying to me?? Why!?” He throw his entire body against Teddy, but Teddy’s frame didn’t move an inch. All he could see was anger. This wasn’t Teddy, there was no way it was. Every minute of silence that stretched between them, erased a memory of them being together, and sent Billy’s mind into a frenzy of emotions._

_“You wouldn’t, Teddy I trust you, I know you, you_ wouldn’t _.”_

_“You don’t know me Billy, you just think you do.”_

_“No!”_

_“Admit it, you just took what you knew for granted. This is who I am Billy, I’m not this perfect image you made out for me, I’m real, I make mistakes.”_

_“You wouldn’t make this mistake, you wouldn’t drive me away, now tell me the truth!! Tell me anything, just don’t lie to me.” His sentence lost strength, and he croaked out the last part. Billy pounded his fists into Teddy’s back, kept sending blow after blow, until Teddy whipped around and caught his hands, he was on his way to transforming._

_“ENOUGH!” Billy looked into Teddy’s eyes, and could see his anger mirrored there, there were streams of tears running down his face, but Teddy’s were dry. The color kept changing, green to blue to green again, it was the closet Billy had ever come to seeing Teddy fight the transformation._

_“Say it.” He kept their eyes level, if Teddy hesitated even a little, he’d know, he’d know enough to forgive Teddy._

_“I have a son.” Teddy’s eyes cleared, like a calm blue sky, and something in Billy broke._

_Everything was so blue, the flames, the light, Teddy’s eyes, and he felt his body slip away, out of Teddy’s reach, and reform again._

_“I’ll kill him. I’ll kill him and you won’t go, you won’t have to go then.” His voice was calm then, and it must have alarmed Teddy because he stepped closer to get him, to shake him._

_“I just need to say the words right? Just like my mother.” Teddy was frantic, trying to contain him, reason with him, but he couldn’t hear anything, there was just the sound of gentle waves, promises of insanity and forgetting._

_He opened his mouth to say the words and Teddy covered his mouth with his palm. Teddy had transformed, his grip felt like pure pressure, but it didn’t hurt, nothing hurt, Billy couldn’t feel anything anymore. He tried to speak but the hand kept his words in, he couldn’t say them. He struggled but the grip wouldn’t loosen. A single finger was wedged between his lips, Billy parted his teeth, a massive feat with Teddy holding on to his jaw so hard. He bit the finger, sank his teeth in until he drew blood._

_Teddy jumped away, then saw Billy looking at him, his eyes almost glazed over._

_“Choose. Me, or him.”_

_Teddy shook his head._

_A single tear fell from Billy’s eye. “If he means so much, then leave. LEAVE!”_

_Teddy stood, and tried to reach out for Billy, but Billy screamed again, and splinters of wood from every direction flew towards Teddy, while Billy’s body was engulfed in blue flames. His clothes were burning in the process, Billy didn’t notice, he was huddled in a corner, his eyes were looking at anything but Teddy’s back as he left. That’s when Billy broke down, hugged his burning body and cried, Teddy’s name a chant he kept repeating._

 

Billy woke up to the sound of the alarm next to his head. His apartment was empty, nothing burnt, nothing destroyed, he looked down at his hands and didn’t see the burns he’d gotten 5 years ago. He sighed and got out of bed.

Jack’s clothes were everywhere, he wrinkled his nose at the dump in every corner, sidestepping them to get to the shower. He’d starting living with Jack a month ago, and had been regretting it ever since. Jack wasn’t the settling down type, so he’d never introduced him to his parents, he’d been the relationship that lasted the most, but Billy wasn’t going to get his hopes up. When he went inside the shower, he noticed the clogged toilet, filled with tissue paper. Maybe it was time to kick Jack out.

He took his shower, grabbed his swimming shorts, and headed out to his part time job. He was a pool lifeguard at the city’s new public resort. The pool had certain schedules to make sure it wasn’t deathly packed everyday. There were gendered days, two kids’ days and family day, and was otherwise closed twice a week for cleaning. He always worked the morning shifts, because they worked well with his final three classes. It gave him something to think about besides his finance and marketing notes.

It was where he met Jack, and he had to admit, most of his boyfriends. But most of his days were spent looking after the crowd in his designated pool, cleaning up after them in case one of them left a surprise in the pool.

Billy didn’t go out much now, the only person he’d see occasionally was Tommy, he and the rest of the avengers had had a falling out soon after Teddy left, and he hadn’t kept in touch with how they were doing now that the team had broken up. He didn’t admit it often, but he was glad Tommy hadn’t abandoned him to fully pursue his career as an Avenger.

It hurt to think of the past, Billy had so much regret coming out of the experience, that he’d changed into a different person to cope with that regret and guilt.

He’d waited for Teddy, waited for a year and every single night in his hospital bed recovering from his burns, he’d kept an eye out his window expecting to see Teddy. But the days passed, oblivious to his pain, and soon his discharge papers were signed and he left the hospital.

There was too much inner turmoil in him to be able to function well within the team. But it wasn’t just that, his power kept fluctuating. One moment he’d be floating, immersed in the middle of battle, to suddenly feel like he was free falling and feeling his body getting crushed against concrete. But those were moments he could handle, when his power grew weak and hurt him, it was when he almost wiped the entire park out of existence that had gotten him off the team.

He knew he was a threat then, and knew that there were Avengers who occasionally checked up on him, even now. But he didn’t mind it, because they were right, he couldn’t control it, not anymore. Billy secretly thought that his own gifts, his powers had lost respect for him. He didn’t use them anymore, he’d locked them away with his memories of Teddy, waiting to forget them as well.

Tommy was too amused for words when Billy had first told him about the lifeguard job earlier that year.

“You just can’t keep away bro, can you?” Billy looked down at Tommy, whose head was in Billy’s lap. Billy pulled the lollipop out of his mouth for a minute to reply.

“It’s a job okay? It’s not like I actively went looking for one where I could save people.” He replaced it back inside his mouth and relaxed further on his couch.

“Why are you eating that?”

Billy pulled it out once again. “Because you don’t like it when I smoke in my own place you selfish jerk.”

“Because cigarettes will kill you.” Tommy pointed out, his finger almost going into Billy’s nose.

“When I’m old and wrinkly, you can have your ‘told you so’ moment.” Billy rolled his eyes at Tommy, smoking was the last of his worries, it was just a habit, and they could be broken.

“What flavor is it anyways?”

“Green apples I think, didn’t really notice the wrapper.” Tommy snatched it from him and placed it inside his mouth instead.

“You’re disgusting, you know that?”

“Excuse me?  _I’m_  disgusting? You’re the one who sticks his tongue God only knows where.” Billy resented the fact that Tommy could talk around the lollipop and still make sense, but didn’t say anything to him, except blush a little at the comment.

“Anyway, why are you here again?”

“Your mom was asking about you.”

“She can always call, she didn’t need to send you especially to check on me. What else is there? Spit it out.”

“Nothing, just the rumors again, you know, that  _he_ ’s coming back.”

Billy sighed, his head hitting the edge of the couch.

“Tommy we’ve been through this. I don’t care, I’m over him.”

“Are you? You don’t seem happily settled down with someone, not like you were then. Most of the time you look like crap, and the rest of it you spend mopping.”

“What about you? That’s all you ever want to talk about, maybe you’re the one pining after him.”

“That was messed up man.”

“So was you thinking I give a shit. Look, he’s here, he’s not here, it’s all the same. I’m not the reason he’s staying away, so you don’t need to keep thinking that I’m the reason he’d come back. We’re grown ups now.”

“You sound so sure, but you never told us why he left. Didn’t he tell you anything?”

Billy didn’t hesitate with his answer, didn’t even have to blink to give Tommy the lie he’d been telling them all for five years. “No, for the millionth time Tommy, he didn’t tell me why he was leaving.”

Tommy wanted to argue, but the door to the apartment opened and Jack walked in. He took a look at them both sitting at the couch and whistled.

“You guys expecting me? I’ve always wanted to try having a threesome with twins.” He winked at Tommy, making a show of licking his lips. Tommy’s entire body gave a shudder, and he stood up to announce he was leaving.

“You can stay for dinner you know.” Billy held the door for his brother, waiting for an answer.

“Yeah, no thanks, not on his watch.” Tommy stopped to look at Billy, then leaned in and whispered in Billy’s ear. “You could do better, you know.”

Billy lowered his head, nodding a little, and Tommy could see his brother’s sixteen year old self again, standing there in front of him. He reached out to hug him, but Billy lifted his head and the moment was broken. “Tell mom I’ll call her. Thanks for dropping by.”

 

Billy’s sleep was heavy with dreams, moments of times he didn’t remember. Flashes of faces, laughing, smiling and mouthing things he couldn’t begin to understand. Then there was blue, an overwhelming abundance of it, it was everywhere and he couldn’t breathe, then the fire started, and Teddy in the fire holding something and telling Billy to save it, to please stop the fire and save his son.

Billy woke up startled, sweating all over, his breathing harsh and groped for the light switch on the nightstand.

Jack’s hand grabbed his left hand, and he sleepily asked him if he was okay.

“I’m f-fine. Just a bad dream. I’ll go take a shower and cool off, okay?” Jack mumbled something back but didn’t get up.

Billy turned on the hot water, and just stood still under the scalding stream of water raining down his back. His hands were on the cool bathroom tile, and soon they slid down with his entire body to the floor.

Billy hugged his knees to his chest, and cried.

He left the shower, and after a minimal amount of drying, went back to bed. Jack shuffled closer to him, kissing his neck. He didn’t feel like it, and gently tried to push Jack off to make that point clear.

“Don’t shut me out. Come on.” Billy’s eyes widened, it was the last thing he’d expected to hear, and it made the guilt buried inside him, surface and eat at his heart in little bites that left a dull ache. He turned to face Jack, and let his body take control.

He went back to sleep once Jack had finally drifted off, and thankfully had no more dreams.

He wasn’t looking forward to the call he’d promised to make to his mom, her prominent questions were always about his relationships, and if he managed to avoid the subject, she’d try to evaluate him and ask if he’d managed to read her book. It was a new area of success for her, and he was every bit as happy that she got published, as he was that it kept her busy, and out of his hair. He looked at his phone, there wasn’t any way around it, so he stopped stalling and dialed.

His mother’s cheerful voice sounded after the second ring, and Billy had mixed emotions at hearing her again, laughing freely, nothing like the strained smile she used to have around him, until he moved out.

 “Billy! You’re never going to guess who just stopped by for lunch!”

“Hello to you too mom. And I’m sure you’re going to tell me anyways.” He rolled his eyes. Must be one of those bigwig professors she was hanging out with now, discussing her book over tea. And discussing the inspiration behind her work on teen psychology and the brain patterns of young superheroes, A.K.A one Billy Kaplan.

“Sorry dear, I was just excited. Hello, how are you? Teddy’s over for lunch and he’s asking about you.” He could tell she was excited, how she’d contained it to deliver the rest of her message was beyond him.

“I’m fine, no worries…” Billy dropped the phone handle.

Teddy. She said  _Teddy_.

He could hear the faint sound of his mother’s voice from the dangling handle, calling him back. His palm was sweaty enough that the handle almost slipped again. Maybe she was joking? No his mother wouldn’t joke about something that had made him flip out and was a sensitive subject. Maybe he’d heard wrong then?

“I-I’m here.”

“Well it’s about time! I’ve been calling out to no end. What’s wrong? Are you sick? Tommy didn’t tell me anything was wrong yesterday.” His mouth was dry, what was she saying again?

“I’m fine. You said…who did you say was over?” Billy could feel his heart pounding in his chest, it was so loud, he almost thought it was coming from the phone.

“Billy, calm down honey. There’s no need to panic. Teddy’s over. It’s been so long, I thought you’d want to see him, don’t you want to? He’s staying with us for a bit. Why don’t you come over today?”

“Come over? No, no I can’t.”

“Why can’t you?” If he admitted he was scared, that he was upset or even slightly more affected by the news, he’d have a world of explaining to do.

“I have work, and classes.”

“Tomorrow’s the weekend, come by and you can sleep over.”

“I have a nightshift tomorrow.” Which wasn’t entirely the truth, but he’d have the shift, he just needed to beg Philip for it.

“That’s plenty of time, Tommy makes the trip all the time.”

“Well I’m sorry I’m not Tommy!” He couldn’t take it anymore, there was no need for her to make that comparison. Billy closed the phone. Maybe he’d let them meddle in his personal life long enough.

He sent Philip a message.

Half an hour later, he found himself reaching for the disconnected phone and trying to call his mother back.

“You had better be calling to apologize.”

“I am. I’m sorry. I just needed some time.”

“You could have said that before you hung up on me.”

“Sorry.”

“Billy, I know you feel like we’re forcing you, but we just want you to be happy. There’s no pressure okay? Consider seeing Teddy as part of the healing process.”

Billy wanted to ask who ‘we’ implied but thought better of it, no use getting into a new argument.

“I’ll think about it.”

“Good. Do you really have a shift tomorrow night?”

“Yes.”

“Alright then, work hard. Come over once in a while, we miss you.”

“I will. Thanks mom.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, you get to see how much I truly love Billy and his amazing powers of denial.

Any normal person’s initial reaction to finding out that people they cared –even remotely- about, and people they haven’t seen in ages, were back, would include hope, happiness and maybe a dash of hurt here or there depending on how they parted.

But not Billy. Billy’s first thought is to get prescriptions for Valium, preferably copious amounts of this happy pill, and contemplating the pros and cons of moving to another country, or planet as the option was readily available.

Billy’s heart and soul were his family, Tommy having dibs on that status the moment he’d realized they shared a face, a body, and very little else. And sure, if he had to summon all his energy, and focus on realistic options and how better he faired than most other gay men his age, he might include Jack.

Might, if he had not just found another dirty underwear on the floor. Then again Jack wasn’t there this morning either, letting Billy’s overactive, anxiety prone brain suspect multiple patterns of behavior that should allude to something important. He just couldn’t think of what that was supposed to be at the moment.

In the spirit of  being vindictive, Billy kicked the underwear.

He checked the clock, and sighing, went to get ready for work. It was kids’ day at the pool, which meant it was going to be busy enough to keep his mind off things.

He didn’t mind his job so much, though if anyone asked him to jump into the pool for fun, it wouldn’t be in any one of the pools he was overseeing. As bad luck would have it, his were almost always the ones that got shut down mid-day for a number of different accidents. He didn’t mind those though, mostly, the chemicals took care of them, it was rather the obvious groping that constantly went on under the water during adult days that made him shrivel up.

Adult days meaning teenagers and up, and really, who ever came up with such as dumb idea as to single handedly create a pool party dream once every week? Billy secretly hated those days for an entirely different reason as well. The reason? Could be summed up into marketing terms of “main attraction”, otherwise known as Billy’s booty.

Adult days got shifted around and taken off the schedule depending on seasons and visitors, so Billy hadn’t had any shifts since they’d been moved to weekends starting this month. He didn’t envy Philip or Andy  who were handling them. Billy didn’t like the parties, true, but owing to those days, he was able to meet Jack. Though he liked to believe it wasn’t because Jack was half naked, and it wasn’t because he was wearing the pool issued black lycra briefs that barely covered his ass. Billy also resented the fact that they printed -right across his ass- the words “pool boy” in hot pink.

Management was  _clearly_  onto him.

The little kids playing in the pool, though they should remind him of his brothers, didn’t. One of them was a little blonde kid with blue eyes, a description that could fit the entirety of Europe and a great percentage of America, but all Billy could think of was the one in his dream. Teddy and the little bundle in his arm. Billy didn’t have nearly enough information on the existence of the kid to map out a description of him, but he figured he’d also be a shape shifter, and the novelty of the description would be lost. Common features were good enough then.

He didn’t want to think about Teddy, but the dream had to mean something.

Then an unpleasant memory sprang to mind, earlier that year, first week of work, and a drowning child. His instincts, caught in the web of fear, in the overwhelming expanse of blue, and in the promise to never show his powers. Strength had taken over moments later and he’d saved the child, but only after he’d swallowed a considerable amount of water. It was a small spark of victory, a little glint of past glory and then it was snuffed out entirely by the reality that his fear of his own magic had frozen him.

He couldn’t understand why the dream was significant now, and why it had started appearing almost in an apparent connection to Teddy’s sudden reunion with the planet. Was he supposed to save the child from his own flames? Was his subconscious telling him to stay away? Or was it a sign that every little kid on the planet with possible blood connections to Teddy would be set on fire?

The sound of the children playing in the pool became sharper in his mind and decidedly louder, dragging Billy out of his revere. He felt sick for even going that far in his thoughts, and vowed to keep a lid on his ventures into the dark recesses of his mind.

“Mr. Kaplan! Something’s flooooating!” The kids squealed and laughed, pointing at the pool. Billy went down his post, picked up a net and thought, maybe the world could use fewer children after all.

After justice had been brought to the pool, Billy decided that he was selling himself short. There should never be anyone on earth capable of sending him back into a self imposed closet of denial. He wasn’t 16 anymore and he was going to prove it, by going out and having fun. The most fun anyone can have ever, the uber top method of getting yourself well and truly happy, the fun called getting smashed and waking up naked next to several strangers in a damp bed.

Billy held fidelity in the highest of all esteem, but the possible sniff of adventure was too strong for him not to get high on. Jack would understand, he was the one who kept telling Billy to go out more, meet more people. Billy’s mind was made up, he checked his watch, saw a little scribble in black on his hand, and remembered he hadn’t printed those damn charts he needed for class.

He was screwed.

Several hours later saw Billy smashed –true to his word-, surrounded with three cans of beer, whom he’d named uber, super and duper. Billy then proceeded to rub his face on the material he’d pulled out of a box in his closet. It was soft, felt good, was so shiny, and amazingly warm. He opened his eyes and stared at the red material, a sense of nostalgia washing over him, or something. There was a hand at the small of his back, but he wasn’t sure it was there until he heard someone speak.

“Wow, look at you.”

“Jaaack, where you?” Billy almost hiccupped the words, and twisted the material in his hand as he tried to turn around and look.

“You mean where was I. I’ve never seen you drunk before, you can pass out now if you want.”

“I’mm not.”

“Ahaa, not drunk, or not gonna pass out?” Jack slid his body over Billy’s, trapping him under, he then looked down and laughed.

“Wush funny?”

“Were you trying on a costume?” Jack tried to tug the cape out of Billy’s hand with little success.

“Thish, no! not costume.” Billy clung to the cape, like a drowning man holding onto a lifeline.

“Right, this is no costume and you’re secretly Clark Kent then?”

“Wrong duh! Wrong comic!”

“..okay then. Scoot over so I can sleep?” When Billy kept blinking at him, comprehension not having set in yet, Jack just rolled him over to the side of the bed he usually slept in.

“’Night drunk.”

“g’night Teddy.”

Jack rolled his eyes before turning the lights off. In the dark, Billy hugged his cape and went to sleep.

 

When the alarm rang next to him, Billy groaned out loud and tried to suffocate himself with his pillow.

“Morning little hero.”

“Jesus. Someone took a hammer to my squishy delicate brain yesterday, didn’t they?”

“Your delicate brain word vomited yesterday, that’s what happened.”

“Please don’t shout. It hurts.”

“I’m not. You don’t remember do you? You called me when I was out and kept babbling about losing your teddy.”

“My….”

“…and then, I walk in and find you hugging this old costume you’ve been keeping in the closet apparently. I have no idea what you drank yesterday, but that was  _some_ trip you took down memory lane.”

Billy, who felt like crap from his hangover, managed to reach a new height of illness, and ignoring his pounding head, rushed to the bathroom to throw up.

Jack came over and stood by the door. “You have work or something?”

Billy nodded, winced, then opened the tap and splashed some water on his face. His hair had gotten long again, and curled around his ears, soaked with sweat.

“Me and a few guys were actually going to go there today. Didn’t ask you because I figured you’d be sick of the pool.”

Billy nodded, his hair falling into his face, when it occurred to him to tell Jack, so he wouldn’t get his hopes up. “Not doing the first shift.”

“Oh.”

“Philip really wanted to see his girlfriend.”

“Well all the world’s joy to him, at this rate, he has more of a relationship than we do.”

“Jack…”

“Never mind. I’m going. Forget it.”

Billy wanted to, really, he wanted to run after Jack and tell him he’d make it up to him; that they could finally have a decent weekend together like they’d promised moving in together would help them do, but another bought of nausea caught up to him and his knuckles went white at the sink before he wretched again. The sound of the door opening and closing, went unnoticed.

Three aspirins, two bottles of water, half a toast and hours later, Billy opened his eyes and found clarity.

He needed to set his priorities straight, never mind the pun, but really he did and quick. Checking the clock, he determined that if he was really quick about it, he could probably manage to catch Jack at the pool and talk to him before his shift started.

From his closet, he grabbed a light blue beach hoodie, some pants and stuffed them in a bag to take with him. He stopped on his way out to shave, being a little more adventurous, Billy shaved his legs before donning his issued tiny swimsuit.

Billy managed to get there before the pool closed, and found Jack in a corner, laughing with a few of his friends. They pointed at him and Jack turned, catching sight of him.

“You’re early.” Jack said it almost in awe and Billy finally felt less like a jerk and glad he’d made the right decision.

“Yeah. I didn’t like the way we parted in the morning. Sorry about yesterday too.” He was holding onto Billy’s arms by then.

“Hey, it’s alright.” Billy leaned in to kiss Jack when Jack pulled them away a bit.

“I promise I washed my teeth and gurgled.” The magic words worked and Jack’s hands slipped down his waist, on his hips and then Billy felt one of them on his ass. He gasped in Jack’s mouth, but didn’t do anything but try to squirm away. A single finger slid under the small fabric of his underwear from the back.

Billy had no time to complain, as a sudden sharp pain shot through the back of his head. His fingers felt tingly, his eyes were a little unfocused now and he couldn’t breathe. Jack let go and looked at him, a bit alarmed at the sudden change.

“You okay?”

“I. Yeah, I think it’s going away.”

“What happened?”

“Crick in my neck? I don’t know, maybe it’s because I didn’t eat anything.”

“Jesus you scared me. Look, let’s go get the guys and we can have lunch somewhere. Your shift’s at 2 right?”

Billy nodded, pain ebbing away slightly. He grabbed onto Jack’s arm for a little, before letting go and following behind him when they got closer to his friends and he heard the wolf whistles.

For a moment there, it felt like he’d had magic.


	3. Chapter 3

Lunch was an uncomfortable affair. They’d settled for one of the diners right outside the pool area, but was still within the establishment. Billy had fries, and nothing more, it was all he could stomach, the sense of nausea returning to him after the zap he’d gotten from God knows what.

But what really made this lunch such a thing were Jack’s friends. A couple tried to hit on him while Jack was placing his order, and the rest of the group kept eyeing him like they knew something. Their stares were condescending and one of the girls sitting in the group was trying her best to sit in Jack’s lap, inching towards him every five minutes when she thought he wasn’t looking. He excused himself at a quarter to two, Jack waved a goodbye at him but didn’t get up.

The minute he was away, Billy grabbed his hoodie from the bag and put it on after unzipping the front. Feeling less vulnerable to stares and less like a piece of meat in an open grill. He sat in the office until the shift started and Andy had came in to give him the maintenance clipboard.

“Julie needs to leave early today, so you’re going to be checking all the pools.” He nodded at Andy. Of course she did.

Jack and his party didn’t come back to the pool, for which he was thankful, and even more thankful that there was no funny business in Philip’s pools. Maybe his were just cursed?

 

It was darker now, the last batch of people were getting ready to leave, drying their bodies with towels and waving at him. Julie passed by him a little while later, her groups had finally left.

It was just him now, in the dark and gloom of the pool, and his own mind. Great. He went back into the office to get the chlorine test kit and the clipboard, when he heard footsteps behind him.

“Thank God, I didn’t want to do all those pools alone Ju…” Billy turned expecting to see Juile, relief written all over his face. Then it all horribly fell.

Teddy stood in front of him.

Every hair on Billy’s body stood up, his hands shook at his sides and suddenly, he was very much aware of his body and his state of undress. If he fainted then, Billy was never going to forgive himself. He breathed, the first one sounding like a gasp, uncontrolled and involuntary. He needed to  _breathe_. His mental exercises kicked in, no negative thoughts, ease, focus, work. Words and sentences he’d memorized came back to him and he was finally well enough to open his eyes, which he hadn’t realized he’d closed, and look at the man standing in front of him.

Teddy was still there, hands in the pockets of his jeans. Just staring at him.

Billy bolted.

He ran right into the office and locked it. Which was ridicules if he thought about it, Teddy was Hulking, the measly door stood no chance against a single punch from Teddy.

There was a knock on the door and Billy almost bit his tongue in his haste to say something like ‘go away’ and pretend he wasn’t there by not saying anything.

“Billy?”

He trembled at the familiar way in which his name was being called. He didn’t think he could speak even if he wanted to at this point. He should have never left his apartment today.

“Can you come out? I’ll give you a few minutes.”

Billy wasn’t sure if there was supposed to be a ‘but’ after that statement, ‘but’ he figured he didn’t want to stick around in the office to find out. For now, he could wear something and feel less vulnerable about the whole thing. He grabbed his bag and tried to calm down, first things first, pants. All it took was a pretend game of normalcy, he could do it, focus on the job.

When he was done, Billy grabbed the test kit, the clipboard and a flashlight. He opened the door to find Teddy sitting at the resting bench right next to the office. He exhaled one more time, gaining some –shaky- confidence and marched out towards the machine rooms. Teddy, for his credit, didn’t move a single muscle from his location and just sat there waiting.

Billy checked the switches, water levels, pump, and wrote the information on the clipboard. He did this for two more rooms since some pools shared machine rooms, then headed towards the pools to gather water samples.

All that kept running in his mind while he did this task, was how much of his bravado had flown out the window by taking a single glance at his ex. He’d spent five years thinking of a million things to say to Teddy when he showed up, and the moment he did? Billy almost had a relapse into a panic attack. There was also the undignified way in which he’d ran into the office and locked himself in. In his pretend speeches, he’d let anger guide him, now though, his body recognized fear and panic first.

Chlorine levels checked out, nothing over, and two pools would need a gram of the chemical by morning to keep the levels even. He scribbled the readings on the charts and went to the office to drop off the kit and clipboard before he left, signing his name on it.

When he left the office, Teddy was standing in front of him again and it was clear that this time, he wasn’t going to budge.

“Don’t you have anything you want to say to me?”

Billy nodded, more for his sake than to give Teddy an answer. That self assured way Teddy was speaking in, the causal no apology approach, the way he was acting? It was like nothing had happened five years ago, Teddy was pretending it was all roses and rainbows and not like they hadn’t seen each other since that day. It hurt to a degree, because he’d kind of moved on, but really hadn’t, and all he really felt at that point was fear of what seeing Teddy would bring. Fear of the fire, the relapses, the screams, even the return of his magic. But there was nothing. No not nothing, because, now that he thought about it, this sort of explained the buzz of pain he’d felt before, under layers of dead magic.

Oh. That meant, all those years..

“You never came back.” It all made sense now, those days, sitting by the window, waiting, thinking he’d glanced something. It dawned on him what a fool he’d been, a fool for hope. He tried to recall if he’d ever felt that sensation before, but there was nothing. “In five years you  _never_  came back, not even once.” It wasn’t a question anymore.

“I did.”

“No, if you had, I’d have noticed.” Billy breathed, shaking a little, “I placed a barrier, when I was sixteen and kept it there, but never once was it triggered.”

“And I always saw it, a very clear blue outline. But then, you never left the confines of the barrier long enough to come see me.”

“It’s you…you’re the one who left me, why would I come looking for you instead? S- so I could get hurt again?” Billy’s legs weren’t steady, and his knees were close to collapsing under him. This was not what he was supposed to say, where was the anger? He turned to the resting bench and sat down.

Right, maybe he wasn’t so unaffected after all.

Teddy came over as well, he sat too close, and when Billy inched away to give him more room, Teddy laid his head in Billy’s lap.

And awkward, and relapse, here we go. How does one push a head off of one’s lap?

“W-what are you doing? Get off.”

“Why? You let Tommy do this.”

“Tommy’s my brother, my twin. You’re…I don’t know what you are to me anymore.” Billy’s hands had a faint tremor in them, so he hid them, pushed his fingers inside his hair and held still for a moment, daring a look at Teddy’s face. He didn’t want to touch Teddy.

Teddy looked hurt by his words, but didn’t budge from his place. He grabbed one of Billy’s hands, pulling it away from his head and kissed his open palm.

Billy felt small, it was like bullying, kind bullying and reality and anger were fast slipping away from him.

“But you love me, don’t you?”

“That’s… I can’t say that for sure.”

Teddy smiled at him, the hurt still apparent in his eyes. “That’s a little mean Billy.”

“And what you did wasn’t?” Billy’s voice broke, and a sob caught in his throat, before tears welled up in his eyes.

“Don’t cry.” Teddy squeezed his hand a little, but Billy didn’t think he could stop his hurt feelings from bubbling over the surface, no matter how sweet Teddy was being. He was angry at him, and Teddy had said so himself, that Billy hadn’t really known his other sides, any side other than his kind one.

“You don’t get to tell me how to feel.” His tears spilled and he sobbed, squeezing Teddy’s hand back.

Teddy moved a hand into his hair, pulled his head down a little, and kissed him.

It was so familiar, the sweet pressure on his lips, the warm, soft feel of them on his almost caused him to moan. Billy stopped crying, and almost reached for Teddy’s neck to bring their lips closer, when he opened his eyes and saw Jack standing in front of them.

“Fuck! What the fuck is going on here Billy?!”

“Jack. I can explain, wait!” Jack lunged at them, and Billy wasn’t sure who his target was.

He only heard the sound of a fist connecting with flesh and saw Teddy stumble back. Teddy took the hit for him, and the side of his mouth was bleeding.

Jack spat on the floor, then glared at him. “We’re over.” He stormed off, leaving them there.

Billy went to help Teddy up, but remembered what they’d been doing when Jack caught them, and held back.

“Can you stand up? Do I need to get help? I didn’t see how hard he hit you so…there’s a kit inside, I’ll grab it and..you’ll stay here.” Billy had never had a worse case of the babbles, not since he’d finished the  _Deathly Hollows_  in one night. He grabbed the first aid kit and looked through it to see if he was missing something, not that he could tell. His mind was racing and he couldn’t focus on a single thought long enough to make sense of it.

When he got back, Teddy was still sitting in the same spot. He put the kit down and grabbed a flash light from inside it, and shined it in Teddy’s eyes. Once he was done he held up one finger.

“How many fingers am I holding up?”

“Just one.”

“Okay. Good, you don’t have a concussion. I’ll treat the cut, then we can leave. I needed to lock this place ten minutes ago.”

Teddy winced a little when Billy dabbed a cotton swab with disinfectant, directly on the cut, but didn’t say anything. Billy pulled a bandage from inside the kit, and placed it so it wouldn’t effect Teddy’s speech and come off.

When Teddy finally stood up, he leaned a little on the nearest wall for support. It didn’t seem like he was well at all. Billy kept wringing his fingers together and thinking about what wanted to do, vs. what he should do, then asked the question he didn’t want to ask. “Where are you staying?”

“Nowhere. Tommy was supposed to pick me up before your job ended.”

Tommy..ha. Billy filed the information for later. He couldn’t believe the nerve of that brat, trying to interfere with his life. Then it occurred to him, just what was going on.

“I bet your wallet’s missing too.” Teddy made a motion to mean no, but once he patted down his back pocket, he nodded.

Billy tried not to sigh loud enough to raise the dead from their graves, and vowed instead to give Tommy an earful like he’d never had before.

Two steps out of the pool, Billy couldn’t stand it anymore and lent Teddy his shoulder.

“Thanks.”

“Just couldn’t stand watching you staggering around.” He wasn’t sure if he should thank Teddy for taking the hit for him. After all, Teddy had kissed him, and Jack had reacted to that. He ignored the sound in the back of his head that reminded him that he’d almost kissed back.

Anger, panic and emotion. Three stages, and he’d went through them in the speed of light, when it should have taken months to hop through them. He had to pretend none of this happened, he couldn’t possibly be over it just by those few minutes.

Billy stopped the first taxi he saw, and climbed in after Teddy. He gave the driver his address, and leaned back to wait for the ride to be over. Which didn’t happen, because his mind kept playing the scene in his head, and then presented him with the dilemma of where Teddy was going to sleep. There was always the couch, but Teddy looked speed lagged, he didn’t even want to know how Tommy got him to the city so fast. Second was that Teddy’s body would be sore, and the couch wasn’t the most comfortable thing to sleep on. He remembered that from a night of falling asleep there after sex.

Which was the main problem. Sex. That was what his bedroom generally meant to him. To drag Teddy there would be weird, and he’d feel completely naked with Teddy around his privacy, and the life he’d built without him.

The driver pulled up next to his building, announcing their arrival, and Billy’s lack of answers.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally some decent Billy/Teddy time.

Once inside the apartment, he noticed that Jack hadn’t gotten back yet. Which suited him fine, so he locked the door and slid the chain so Jack wouldn’t have any funny ideas about showing up later.

“You sure about doing that? Won’t he get angry?”

“How do you know he lives here?” Billy narrowed his eyes at Teddy, arms crossed. “Think carefully before you answer that.”

Teddy held for a minute before sighing and giving up his source. “Tommy.”

“I knew it! What the fuck’s he been  _doing_. Broadcasting my entire life to anyone who’d listen?”

“No, just to me.” Teddy grinned, then winced and touched his head.

“You won’t find this funny when I’m done with the both of you.”

“Oooh I’m scared, whatcha gonna do Billy?”

Billy smiled slowly, but there was no mirth in it. “For starters, not give you any Aspirin”. With that parting shot he left the room.

He couldn’t believe he’d even entertained the idea of letting Teddy have the bed. There was no way, no way in  _hell_.

The closet was his destination next, he went through it and found clean sheets, and the extra blanket he bought when Tommy started hanging out at his apartment. When he walked back out, Teddy was in the bathroom, and it occurred to him that he didn’t have anything for Teddy to wear, or even a tooth brush.

Removing the excess cushions made the couch seem a bit larger, it would be a snug space for Teddy, but not small enough that he’d fall off. He hoped at least. His mind had been so busy with other details, that he hadn’t taken the time to really study how much Teddy had grown and changed in the time they’d been apart. Not that he  _should_  have, but Teddy had been a..well not a friend, and he defiantly didn’t want to use the other term, umm fellow teammate? Sort of, it was better than others. Right, so teammate, that’s a legitimate reason for him to be interested in the changes.

His hands were on auto pilot, place the sheet, tuck in corners, change the pillow case and set the cover. Hands busy, and mind rather occupied, he failed to notice Teddy coming out of the bathroom.

“I stink.”

Billy jumped, scared right out of his thoughts and looked at Teddy, who’d decided to let go of his shirt, pants and socks. Thankfully, he’d kept his undershirt and boxers, but between how the material of the undershirt clung to his upper body, and how loose and exposing the boxers were, Billy wasn’t sure if this was better, or worse than Teddy showing up naked.

“I’m sorry I don’t have a change of clothes.” His eyes were running all over Teddy’s toned figure. He was a lot taller than Billy remembered, even with Billy’s own growth spurt, but Teddy had just grown in a massive way. His face was sharper now and a five o’clock shadow was obvious on his face. He’d probably appreciate the shave, Billy thought, scanning the rest of Teddy’s body. He’d changed, little nuances here and there, but nothing Billy remembered being there, except for his eyes, his eyes never changed.

Teddy had one hand on his hip, he was waiting to catch his eyes, and when he managed to, he had an smirk on face. “Like what you see?”

“More like trying to see if Jack’s clothes would fit you.”

Teddy made a disgusted face.

“You can’t expect me to lend you my clothes, I don’t have anything in your size.” He’d said it in the spur of the moment, and regretted it seconds later when he saw the unmistakable sight of Teddy transforming.

There was a sick feeling in his gut, not at all like eating too much, it was akin to inner muscles clenching on a hollow stomach, and bile raising in his throat. His face was hot, blood rushing from all over to gather there, making the rest of his body cold, icy.

Only when he began to hyperventilate, did he recognize that he was having a real panic attack.

Teddy’s sixteen year old figure stood in front of him, and all Billy could do, was try and breathe through the feeling of chocking that surrounded him. Flashes of the past came back to mind, screams, Teddy’s angry eyes and that single ‘enough’ that Billy didn’t ever want to hear again.

Teddy saw him clawing at his own throat to breathe and rushed to his side, the figure of his younger self disappearing like mist from his true form.

“Breathe.”

Billy shook his head, he needed a bag, anything, he needed air. “A-air.” He croaked out between trying to breathe and grabbing onto Teddy.

“It’s alright, I’m here. Focus on me.” Teddy rubbed the back of his neck, trying to get him to sit down, and pushing them to the ground together. Billy was half sitting in Teddy’s lap by then, Teddy murmuring words, rubbing his back slowly.

“Come back Billy, come back to me.”

It took a while to get words out, but the panic was ebbing away. Once he focused on 21 year old Teddy, and what he was saying, breathing became easier, and air rushed to his lungs. Billy slumped a little in relief, embarrassed to find traces of tears in his eyes. Teddy didn’t comment, and didn’t let go until Billy gently removed the hand he’d just now noticed was stroking his face.

He could tell that Teddy wanted to do more, and was hesitating, but it was apparent that guilt would settle into the atmosphere and make the rest of their already awkward reunion, a soap opera. “Water.”

Getting Teddy busy would help, so Billy pointed to the kitchen, and slowly stood up to go and wash his face. When he came back, Billy handed Teddy the Aspirin, and grabbed the glass of water for himself.

It was another one of those moments where he considered thanks over being silent, but decided he’d been a real jerk to Teddy already, and he’d probably had no idea Billy would have that reaction.

“Thanks.”

Teddy gave him a small smile, but it was clear that he was upset by what had happened. “No problem.”

“Teddy,” Billy stopped short, the name had rolled right off his tongue, with such ease that he hadn’t noticed he’d said it until he saw Teddy snap to attention. “Um, please don’t dwell on it, okay? It’s over, and if you keep thinking about it, it’ll only make us both embarrassed –well more me than you-, so please. For my sake.”

Teddy nodded once, and Billy hoped it was the end of that.

“Do you want dinner? I don’t know if you ate or not. We can order out.”

“Yeah, sure if you want. Pizza?”

Billy laughed, nothing loud, just a gust of air that left him halfway between surprise and amusement. “I was thinking more Chinese actually.” He’d lost some of his taste for it, pizza was and always would be his and Teddy’s thing. He didn’t shun the food completely, but it wasn’t often that it was his choice for greasy and fattening comfort food.

Teddy pouted a little, pretending to have objections about the food. “It still makes for a change.”

“What did you use to have over there anyway?”

“Uh, you know, your average green potato and purple vegetable mesh. They’re very into what you should and shouldn’t eat. All about the body builder image. I could have told them half the people they were glorifying were taking shots, but it would have ruined the fun.” He winked at Billy.

Billy really laughed at that, not just the image of them groping statues and each other to see their muscles, but at Teddy’s face when he was talking about the food.

“I’ll leave the pizza for next time, how does that sound?”

“You mean there’s a next time?”

Billy blushed, it had just slipped out. “Don’t push your luck.” Teddy just grinned back at him, his eyes making a promise to do more than just that.

Aside from the minor jump when the doorbell rang to announce the delivery guy’s presence, there weren’t any surprises, and no cause for much talk. Billy figured that just like him, Teddy must have been re-evaluating the changes that had occurred in each of them, and how much they’d given away of themselves that night.

Teddy’s yawn was a much needed sign for the both of them to excuse themselves and call it a night. When Teddy got too close to him to say goodnight, Billy unconsciously took a couple of steps back, giving them some space, and remembering the kiss at the pool. Teddy backed off when he’d done that, the hands at his sides clenching and unclenching into a fist.

Billy said goodnight and left, quelling the urge to re-assure Teddy and apologize for being cautious. He was so exhausted from the entire day, that Billy was sure he should have won some amazing prize for making it through without a scratch. He tucked himself into bed, turned off the light, and tried not to think of the large figure occupying his couch.

————

_“And for outstanding human compassion and a fascinating ability to cope with the hurdles of life, this year’s noble prize goes tooooo Billy Kaplan!!”_

_Billy looked around, shocked in the midst of a crowd of people, applauding him and smiling. He looked at the host next, not sure what to expect. A noble prize? Him? Since when?_

_“For this title, no ordinary statue shall suffice, for you Mr. Kaplan we’re offering the real deal. Bring out the teddy!”_

_The audience cheered, the curtain was lifted and in its place was Teddy, standing in only his shorts, much undressed since he’d last seen him before bed._

_Teddy grabbed him from the waist, then forcibly brought their lips together. The sound of the two of them breathing while Teddy licked the entire structure of his mouth clean, drowned out the sound of their viewers and made every detail minor. Teddy pulled back to look at him, eyes dancing with mirth._

_“Wake up.”_

It took Billy about two seconds to realize that sentence wasn’t part of his dream and someone must have said it. He jumped up into a sitting position and blinked his eyes open several times before he could really see. Teddy was standing by his bedroom door, looking at him and trying to hide a laugh.

Billy looked down and his eyes focused on the obvious tent in the almost smooth blanket. He quickly gathered more of the blanket to dump in his lap before clearing his mouth to ask Teddy what he thought was so important he’d barged into his room.

“Your phone’s been ringing nonstop for an hour now. You left it at the table outside.”

“Sorry, I guess it woke you up. Uh, can I have a moment please?”

“Sure. Take all the time you need.”

The sentence was full of sarcasm, and Billy’s only reason for not responding, was the awkward moment of realization that the boner he had was caused by the dream in which he was making out with Teddy.

Another moment of awkwardness presented itself when he realized he had to pass by Teddy again to go to the bathroom and take care of his problem. Hopefully Teddy would think it was just morning wood and not think too deeply on whether Billy woke up like that everyday.

He grabbed a clean outfit and a towel from the closet, he might as well shower while he was at it.

When he left the room, he found Teddy going through his kitchen, probably looking for something to eat.

“Bottom cabinet, behind the cans.”

Teddy looked at him with obvious confusion, but Billy just moved to the table to check his phone. Teddy had all the time in the world to look and find what Billy was trying to point out to him.

When he heard the unmistakable sound of small things shaking in a box, he grinned. Teddy brandished his find of Cap’n Crunch cereal like it was a sword, enjoying a moment with the sugary treat.

Billy’s missed calls were nothing to sneeze at, there was one made from his house, one from Tommy’s cell, and the rest were all from Jack. He cursed under his breathe, but thankfully, Teddy was too busy having a moment with Cap’n Crunch to pay him any mind. Shower, and then he got his life back under control.

His boner had deflated considerably since he’d woken up, and so a little cold water was really all the medication he needed. A sadistic part of him had wondered about jerking off in the shower while Teddy was close enough to hear him and realize what he was doing, but he quelled it down.

A knock sounded on the door, and Billy shut the water off to see what Teddy wanted.

“Yeah.”

“Billy I need to go in.”

“Hold off for a few minutes, I’m almost done.”

“No I  _really_  need to go.”

“Teddy I’m not sure how it was between you and your Kree buddies, but there’s no way I’m letting you take a leak while I’m still in here.” It was the first time he’d brought it up on his own, so Billy wasn’t really sure about Teddy’s reaction. Teddy already barged into his dream, his bedroom and found him erect, letting him use the bathroom at the same time would just finish off the rest of Billy’s sanity.

“Come on then.”

“How  _impatient_. Give me a minute.” Billy dried off quickly, reaching for his folded clothes in a hurry. It took less than a few minutes for him to leave the bathroom and see Teddy charge right in, slamming the door after him.

Billy used the chance to call up Jack, while Teddy was otherwise occupied, and took the call in his room. It wasn’t a pretty conversation, nor was it nasty, all Jack had said was that they needed to talk. When Billy was done scribbling their meeting location and time on a old receipt in the room, Jack asked if that ‘person’ was over, and Billy said yes. He tried to explain in the least number of words, that there was a perfectly logical reason for that, but only ended up saying he’d explain.

When Billy left his room, he found Teddy on the sofa, groaning in pain and clutching his stomach.

“You alright over there?”

“Ugh. I was too ambitious, and underestimated how much diverse food my system could handle in two days. Surprise surprise, not a lot.”

“Do you need to see a doctor?”

“My wallet isn’t with me. Can’t you help?”

“I don’t know if I have something, but I’ll check?”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“I know what you meant!” Billy snapped at him. He didn’t want to get into this again, his obviously flaky feelings aside, his magic was a taboo subject.

Teddy didn’t say anything, his hold on his stomach going noticeably tighter.

Billy’s anger and anxiety over his impending meeting with Jack and now finding out that Teddy was sick, was slowly shaping up his morning to an obvious bad sign for the rest of the day.

“I’ll go get you something for this, stay put.” He didn’t change from his causal wear, picked up his keys from the counter where he’d left them, and headed off. He tried his best not to look at Teddy as he left.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Secrets start to unravel.

Stress relief, breathe in, breathe out, make mental lists.

Yogurt? Check. Potatoes? Check. Rice? Check.

One trip down, another to go. He picked up the food first, and headed towards the nearest drugstore, the image of Teddy on his couch on his mind.

He didn’t want to go back there if it was going to be awkward, but on the other hand, Teddy might suffer longer if he skipped and went to his ‘talk’ with Jack first.

And then there was Jack. As much as Billy tried to summon an agonizing sense of guilt over what had happened, he couldn’t. Then he got angry at himself for being a lousy human being for not feeling how he’d betrayed their relationship. Even if he was feeling as guilty as he should have been feeling, there was no way he could kick Teddy out of his apartment. Which brought him back to Teddy, again, on the couch. There was a hint there somewhere in this linear train of thought, but Billy chose to ignore it. He got the medication and left.

Teddy was curled up on himself, a massive feat considering his size, and it touched Billy’s heart a little.

“Hey. Sorry about before. I got you some meds. It should help with the pain.”

He set everything on his kitchen counter, then took out the little pill box and set it aside, going to fill a glass of water. Billy noticed that Teddy had cleaned up after his meal, the washed bowel sitting in the washed stack.

“Can you sit up to take these? The guy said to keep hydrated as well, so drink water whenever you can.”

Teddy stood up slowly, and Billy noticed that his clothes were almost soaked through. He hadn’t realized how sick Teddy really was. Teddy washed the pill down with a glass of water. Whatever healthy color was in his face when Billy saw him last, was replaced with an ashen color now. Making a decision, Billy placed one arm under Teddy’s, and tried to pull him to his feet. Teddy staggered for a while, then pushed to walk the last three steps to Billy’s bed, collapsing right on top when he did get there.

Billy covered him, then went and grabbed the extra blanket and draped it over Teddy.

By the time the potatoes had cooked through, there was only half an hour left until his meeting with Jack. Billy sealed them and went to check up on Teddy. He’d fallen asleep at some point, and Billy couldn’t blame him, the medication didn’t kick in until much later. He scribbled a small note and left it next to Teddy, grabbing a change of clothes before he left the room.

He turned his key to lock the door, and left, not knowing that the minute the lock had slid in, Teddy had opened his eyes.

He tried to call Tommy on his way to the café where he was meeting Jack, but all he got was an out of coverage message. Deciding to leave a message instead, Billy wrote Tommy a full page letter of threats that he’d make good on, if he failed to call back today, and asked if Tommy could at least bring Teddy a change of clothes from his bags. He worked a job sure, but Billy wasn’t rich by any means.

He sat at the café and waited for Jack to show up, which didn’t take long at all, much to Billy’s discomfort.

“Shall we sit at the benches? More private that way.” Billy nodded, grabbing his steaming cup of coffee and following Jack to a bench that looked on to the park. It was buzzing with people and activity, making him feel idle by just sitting there as a spectator. Billy sipped his coffee.

“So, are you going to explain to me what happened yesterday?”

“It’s a little complicated.”

“What’s so complicated about going back to fetch your boyfriend and finding him kissing some other guy?”

“He’s my ex.”

“And you let all your ex-boyfriends kiss you?”

“It wasn’t like that! Just let me explain for a sec okay?”

“Sure.”

“I haven’t seen him in years, and he showed up out of nowhere. I thought he might have came back to apologize because he basically cheated on-” Then it clicked. Sweet mother of  _paranoia_  that was the missing detail. As if to prove his point further, Jack just froze to his spot.

“You! You were cheating on me! That’s why your friends kept making all those comments and kept looking at me funny. That’s why you got pissed off when I called you, you didn’t know I was drunk, you thought I’d found out! God this all makes so much more sense now.”

More than being upset, Billy just couldn’t believe his luck, two cheaters in one day, and he was caught making out with the former one. “How long? Since when?”

Jack had the decency to look ashamed of himself, he slumped down and tried to hide his face.

“You wanted to talk Jack, well guess what, this is exactly what we’re going to do.”

Jack mumbled something, the earlier arrogance and anger leaving him so that he was open for attacks.

“You can do better than that, don’t hold back on me  _now_. Remember? And here I was acting like the little domestic help, feeling guilty about not meeting all your manly needs, you two timing shit.”

“Before we moved in together. I, I thought if we started living together it would change, I swear. That was my intention, but then I panicked, I didn’t want to be tied down so soon.” Jack looked at him briefly, trying to glean an ounce of sympathy. “Besides, you weren’t being faithful either.”

“Screw you. He kissed me not the other way around. And I’m not the one who’s been doing this for months like you have.”

Jack looked like he might object to the point, when he caught Billy’s glare and the implied rip-you-to-shreds reply he’d get.

“So where does this leave us?”

“There’s no us anymore Jack. You’d better get your stuff out of my apartment by today. Honestly, I should be more upset with you. You just got lucky because this isn’t the first time this has happened.”

“I don’t have a place to stay at, can’t you give me until tomorrow at least?”

“Find the bitch who wanted in your pants so bad yesterday, she’ll probably put you up. And if you’re not there by the end of the day, I’m throwing your stuff out the window.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll get a bag or something and come over. Just don’t throw anything.”

Billy stood up and left, he felt like a heavy weight had been lifted off his shoulder. The frozen stance he’d walked all the way to the café sprouting, was now gone. Tommy was right, he could do so much better.

Billy stopped at old sports shop tucked away in a corner that had a clearance sign out. He wasn’t rich, but there was no reason not to celebrate his singlehood. Today, he was having pizza.

When Billy made it back home, Teddy was still in the bed, sleeping it seemed. He went back to the kitchen, got the potatoes out and  started to re-heat them, pulling out the yogurt from the fridge. For himself, Billy made a couple of sandwiches for lunch, and looking at his almost empty fridge, reconsidered buying the pizza, and save up by making one instead.

A soft breeze filled the room, and only then did Billy notice the open window. Maybe that was how Teddy got sick, he frowned, not recalling he ever opened it, and shut it.

Teddy woke up after the second time he shook him, the meal wasn’t exactly appetizing but Billy insisted he’d at least drink some water. Once they were eating, Billy told him about the clothes in the plastic bag.

“I couldn’t find any underwear, so I grabbed a pair of shorts. You can wear them while your clothes get washed.” It was a lie though, there was a box load of jockstraps, and he’d even taken a moment to consider grabbing one or three in Teddy’s size; before he remembered that his brain had no problem slipping filthy ideas into his subconscious without their aid.

Teddy gave him a wide smile, and Billy had to take a huge bite of his sandwich to keep his smile in check, and maybe, just maybe, the bite he swallowed would squish the butterflies fluttering in his stomach into flat motionless pulp.

It didn’t work. But the sound of a key turning in the lock did. Billy looked up and found that he’d replaced the chain when he’d gotten back, which gave him enough time to shoo Teddy away into the shower.

He removed the chain after he’d told Jack to step back and close the door, and opened it himself.

Jack gave the place a quick scan, his face frowning when he noticed the two plates, the sheets on the couch and the pillows.

“He’s here?”

“None of your business. Get packing.”

“You weren’t this nasty before.”

“I wasn’t trying to get rid of you then.”

“You know, it doesn’t matter, in the end we both cheated on-” Billy pushed Jack away from the bathroom door to the bedroom, he didn’t want Teddy to hear this conversation.

“I understand you’re bitter about getting kicked out, but this originally was my apartment and you were staying with your parents. Move on.”

Jack kept grumbling while he packed his belongings in a big trash bag. Billy kept an eye on him because he kept trying to grab Billy’s things in the process as ‘compensation’.

It was seconds later when they’d left the room, that Billy realized he’d pushed Teddy in the bathroom, sans the clean clothes. Jack tapped his foot in waiting, he’d never really contributed to the apartment’s kitchen or design, so all that was left was the bathroom to rifle through.

Billy knocked on the door, it flew open, Teddy a vision of nakedness with a flimsy towel wrapped around his midsection. Great, guess who decided to take a shower. Billy picked up the plastic bag off the floor and pushed it in Teddy’s hands.

“Room’s clear, go change there.”

Teddy just nodded and left.

Jack on the other hand, had his jaw open to an impossible degree without it being hurtful. Billy almost laughed at him, he could just bet that Jack was feeling inferior to Teddy, and thinking Billy was back with him now that Jack was out of the picture.

“Uhem. The bathroom’s empty.”

“Right.”

Jack’s hand hovered over the plastic drawers on the side, where Billy kept the excess soap, toilet paper and other minor stuff. He pulled the very last one open and pointed at a box sitting there.

“These are going to be your compensation.” Billy looked over Jack’s shoulder to see what it was. A new box of condoms.

“I don’t know if that’s really sweet of you, or plain harassment. How long’s this been sitting here?” Billy didn’t want to recall if Tommy ever made a funny comment after he’d used the bathroom, this was too much.

“It’s a gift for you and your  _guest_.”

“There’s only one guest here, and he’s overstayed his welcome.” Billy shoved a finger in the middle of Jack’s chest, done with giving him hints. Jack made to grab his arm, when Teddy walked in and Jack deflated.

He went and gathered his shoes from the side of the door, then removed the key to the apartment from the set of keys he had, leaving it on the counter.

Only when Jack finally left, did Billy sink onto the couch in relief.

“Tough day?”

“No, just my days getting more complicated.”

“I’m sorry about you and your boyfriend.” Teddy had said it in such a monotone voice, Billy knew he wasn’t remotely sincere about it.

“It was long overdue. You got your clothes out? I’ll put them in the washer.” The sooner he got the little things out of the way, the faster he could just laze around and take a nap.

Teddy handed him everything but his underwear, and when Billy wrinkled his nose at this, Teddy coughed before saying he’d already washed it himself. Billy decided he didn’t want to know why and just grabbed the clothes he had.

——————-

“You sure it’s okay to come out?”

“Yeah, Billy’s sleeping, been a rough day for him.”

“And you figure this out how?”

“He broke up with that asshole, you know, the slinky haired one.”

“Jack? What a relief.”

“He was cheating on him, you can type that into your report.”

“And Billy just told you all this, clinging to you in tears of despair and asking you to move in instead?” Tommy lifted an eyebrow, he’d like to think he knew his brother better than that.

“No doofus, I followed them.”

“Without your suit? Did you decide to fly all naked and green over the city?”

“No! What’s wrong with you? I may have ripped my only pair of boxers, but I wasn’t entirely naked.”

Tommy almost doubled over with laughter, Teddy just glared at him.

“If you’d just brought my stuff over, none of this would have happened.”

“If I had, you’d be staying at a hotel. Billy’s like that, he likes his personal space, he’s only sharing it now out of pity. How long do you think it took me to win the couch?”

Teddy smirked at him. “Who says I slept on the couch?”

Tommy wasn’t impressed, and grabbed Teddy’s t-shirt by the neck. “That had better be a joke Teddy.” The very idea that Billy would do a massive one eighty in the span of two days had Tommy’s brain spinning faster than his legs could run.

Teddy lifted his hands up in mock surrender “Chill. It’s like you said, I got sick in the morning and he offered the bed. I slept on the couch last night.”

“Sick?”

“I may have binged on the box of Cap’n Crunch, after a heavy meal of Chinese takeout.”

“So there was a box of Cap’n Crunch in the apartment after all,  I knew Billy was hiding it!” Tommy let go of his hold on Teddy, looking deep in thought.

“I need to go back inside, the roof’s freezing.”

“You came in through the window again?”

“Yeah. Listen Tommy, this can’t go on like this, I don’t like feeling like I’m sponging off your brother. Come over and bring my stuff. Besides, he really needs to talk to you.”

“Well you need to talk to him first. You’ve been pussy footing around the topic, haven’t you? You need to tell him the truth.”

“I’m not sure about this entire thing. I’ve changed, and I don’t think Billy wants what I have to offer.”

“You owe him the truth, besides, it’s up to him whether he’ll take you back or not.”

“Like I said, I’m not really keen on the idea after seeing him. He’s moved on.” Teddy had a nervous habit of threading and unthreading his fingers together when he was conflicted and most of all, when he was lying. Tommy’s temper flared up.

“You mean to tell me that it’s Billy whose changed, and you don’t really like what he’s become.”

“No, that’s not what I meant. I just want to spare your brother more grief.” Teddy’s fingers stilled. Tommy’s eyes observed him, waiting for a sign, for something to give, but there wasn’t anything now. Teddy’s training maybe.

“Don’t make me regret letting you back into his life, I didn’t spend five years of my life spying on him, for you to decide it’s too troublesome.”

“That’s your job Tommy, don’t make it seem like you were doing it for my sake.”

“Get going before I really lose my temper.”

“Guess I’m not the only one in denial.”

“Don’t hurt him Teddy, or I swear I’ll come after you even in that Kree rat hole you stay in.”

“I won’t. I never really meant to.”

Teddy climbed down to the nearest fire escape route, and then disappeared into the window he’d left open for the second time that day.

Tommy stood up, cleared the dust on his clothes, ready to leave. “Don’t make me regret handing him over.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy how this idea came about. :)

There is very little to do in Billy’s apartment. Billy knows this because he abandoned his game consoles at home, and decided he could keep busy without a TV in his life. Jack being out-doors-y had evened it out when he’d moved in, but now,  with nothing to do but stare at Teddy, he was going to lose his mind.

He tried calling Tommy again, his mom,  _anyone_ , but they’d all given him the cold no reply shoulder. It didn’t sit well with him, Billy hated how obvious it was that people were trying to interfere with his life, making plans revolving around him without his consent. He’d had enough with just finding out that his last relationship was almost entirely one sided.

Teddy on the other hand was in a dark mood, he kept to the side and hadn’t really said much since Billy woke up from his nap. There was something heavy in the air between them, and it got less comfortable as the clock ticked away.

“I..”

“Billy..”

Billy looked up, and motioned for Teddy to go ahead.

“I need to talk to you about what happened when I left.”

He nodded, it was probably for the best. Maybe he was wrong, and Teddy really did came back for closure, and maybe that would stop his dreams. And maybe the both of them had dodged this topic for too long. What did his mother call this again? Part of the healing process? “It’s okay. My panic attacks have specific triggers, I believe we covered most of their topics already. Go on.” There was no need to be bashful now that he’d done every little possible thing known to be associated with mental instability to drive people away, in front of Teddy.

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

“What do you remember about that day?”

“You said you had a son, that you needed to protect him, protect your family. You said you made a mistake.” Billy hid his fingers under his thighs, just remembering made them a little shaky. But he wanted to know, if he was ever going to feel like people shouldn’t have control of his life, he needed to hear this and be okay when it was over.

“You have a good memory.”

“It’s not something you’d normally forget.”

“Sorry.”

“Just, can I ask? Does..does he look like you?” Billy was digging his own grave with this question, if Teddy said yes, he’d have a solid image of the kid who kept showing up in his dreams.

“No.”

Startled, Billy looked up to see Teddy look at him, he was serious.

“How?”

“I’ll start from the beginning, no interruptions okay?” At Billy’s nod, Teddy began.

He explained how, the night before he’d went to Billy’s, a female Kree found him outside and pleaded with him to help KL’RT. Shocked that she knew the name of the super Skrull who took his place, she admitted that she knew him and was his personal attendant.

She told Teddy that not many Kree were happy that he’d returned, precisely because he was only half and had not sworn loyalty to them. They’d try to harm him on purpose during battles and aim to discredit him. She’d gone in to help with his wounds when she saw his true form. He’d done it to regenerate faster, he explained.

Teddy stopped before he told Billy the next part, only because it would change everything. She’d fallen in love with KL’RT who was so different and kind and she saw him as a hero in his loyalty. That’s when they had the baby. There was an uproar, between soldiers who saw this as a sign that he’d already chosen a side, and others who believed that he was going to take the child with him when his half earth year was finished. That’s when a group had ambushed him and almost killed him. He’d fallen into a regeneration coma, she panicked and told them that he’d went on one of his earth visits, and came to see Teddy.

“I couldn’t get in contact with anyone at the time. I went to see the Avengers and found that someone had tailed her. We were attacked by the Skrulls, I knew they were keeping tabs on KL’RT, so when they saw me with her, they figured I was running away from the agreement.”

Billy was frozen to his seat, he couldn’t focus on a single thought long enough to form a response.

“I managed to locate Steve after we rounded them up, and give him the situation. He thought that raising Will would make him the Kree’s substitute for me. I refused at first. But the more time I spent thinking of what had happened to me when I was take away from both my parents, I couldn’t do that to him.”

Teddy looked briefly at Billy, begging his understanding, some part of him still feeling guilty about how running away from his responsibilities had caused so much damage. Teddy was shaking a little, but he went on.

“We named him Will. He’s recognized as my son in both the Kree and the Skrull kingdoms. What I said that day, it was a lie, but I felt that if I didn’t say it, there was no possible way I could ever let you go.”

“Ted..I..it’s a little hard to take in.” There was a range of emotions attacking his every senses, Billy didn’t know how to handle them, he was angry, then he was not, he was happy, elated and confused, so very confused over what he should do with all this new knowledge that Teddy had never betrayed him.

“I love you Billy, I always have and always will. That’s all I really wanted to tell you.” There were traces of tears on Teddy’s face, Billy hadn’t realized that Teddy was crying during his explanation.

Billy felt like his heart was being ripped to shreds, his memories of that night getting mangled with the reality of the turmoil Teddy must have been going through, every single word, shout and scream that he thought was directed at him, was Teddy trying to convince his own self to just let go, that it was over, enough.

He felt small and sheltered. While he was bemoaning his luck and being betrayed, he was still surrounded with people who could help him, people who knew him. His family, Tommy and to a degree, all of the Avengers and the Young Avengers had tried to help him move on. They were so cautious, that all Billy could see at that time, was how scared of his abilities they were. He’d had a life of his own choosing, it may have not been without hurt and struggle, but so much of it had been Billy’s choosing.

He couldn’t say the same for Teddy. Teddy had been shouldering this massive burden of protecting the people he’s indirectly placed in the way of harm. Teddy had no one, even the family he had to protect, wasn’t his own. So much of the hurt he felt, he knew Teddy shared, the thought that Teddy might have told him this years before, when he was allowed to be selfish and demanding, would have caused the lives of the people Teddy protected, to be lost. The core characteristic of Teddy, was his kindness, if he hadn’t gone, Billy knew that the Teddy in front of him would be nothing but a self-loathing shell of the man he currently was.

He stood up and walked towards Teddy. He knelt by Teddy’s feet, and slid his fingers through the fine blond hair, he traced Teddy’s cheek, his ears and piercings. His first two kiss were to Teddy’s eyelids, one on his cheek, then he brought their lips together.

“Billy?”

“I love you. I love you. You stupid, green, lying, horrible excuse of an ogre boyfriend. So just shut up and make it up for me, for all those years I’ve spent waiting.”  _And hoping and loving you and wanting to hate you so much that I almost lost everything_.

“I promise to do just that.”

They spent the rest of the day like that, in an awkward cuddle on the too small couch. Teddy commenting once in a while about his visits to earth, trying to see Billy, how he felt when he left. Billy would counter with how he waited, how Steve never told him anything, how he told everyone that Teddy had just up and left without saying why, just so Billy wouldn’t have to deal with a different sort of pity.

There was more under their surface of happiness, blame and guilt, but for that moment, Billy was content just basking in the feelings of peace, truth and hope.

————————

They had an awkward dinner of really water-y rice, curtsy of Teddy’s upset stomach, and Billy’s empty fridge. It was more of a laugh than a dinner, it was so surreal Billy thought he’d wake up later and find that he’d dreamed it all.

He excused himself after the food was put away, and went to the drawers near the door to grab something.

At the sight of the cigarette box and lighter, Teddy frowned a little.

“Don’t make that face, I haven’t had one all day, and I’m going to smoke it outside.” Billy waved it off like it was no big deal, and left the apartment. He didn’t even seem upset by Teddy’s reaction.

The apartment didn’t smell like smoke, so he’d completely forgotten about this new aspect of Billy’s life. It was one thing to know about it, and an entirely different thing to see it first hand.

He wondered about what Tommy had said, maybe he did expect to come back and find that Billy had been time frozen into his sixteen year old body and personality and was eager to pick up from where they left off last.

There were things he couldn’t understand about this new Billy. Magic was such a large part of who Billy was, so much that Teddy expected to see it’s signal all over Billy and his apartment. As things were, the only trace of him ever having the ability to conjure anything his heart desired, was that barrier. It had taken little to no resistance at all to pop the barrier and enter through it, it had only looked intimidating. Then again, Teddy had been so furious when he saw the obvious groping going on between Billy and his boyfriend, that he wasn’t sure exactly how much strength he’d used to rip right through it.

The way Tommy said it, implied that what happened with that clear fire of blue energy must have drained all of Billy’s reserves and his power was now dormant. Though thinking back, wasn’t that a similar case to the Scarlet Witch’s? So then, what could possibly be Billy’s switch?

—————

Billy chose to ignore the disgusted look on Teddy’s face when he’d brought up the little box in his hand.

It wasn’t so much an addiction as it was a habit now, he’d had to deal with several people, including his family, who didn’t appreciate the fact he was now smoking. It was one of the many things Billy had taken up to rebel. It was also a slight comfort, something in his hand when the itch of having no magic in his fingers got too much to handle. The cigarette burned all the way to the filter, he’d only smoked half of it. Unlike alcohol, it wasn’t sweet, and it burned going in and out of his lungs, the type of burn that, without practice, gave you tears in your eyes and the sense of self-abuse only scalding your body in a hot shower would give. That, and smoking never gave him blackouts.

He stubbed it on the rim of the trashcan, dropping it inside before going back up his apartment.

 

“Hey. I’m back.”

Teddy looked up from the small magazine he’d found under the coffee table. He nodded at Billy, though he seemed rather occupied.

“I need to get up early for work tomorrow, but you’re welcome to stay up. I’ll get you the laptop if you want to watch something. Oh, I also have the latest issues of all the mainstream comics I used to read back then, you know, in case you want to catch up.”

Billy had been so excited while talking about the last part, that whatever Teddy had been brooding over was gone from his face, and was replaced with a smile. “I’ll do that.”

“Don’t get into any weird folders okay? I’m not embarrassed or anything, but Tommy was traumatized, and he’s a pretty difficult person to shake up.” Billy’s eyes had a wicked glint in them, almost as if he were challenging Teddy to do the exact same opposite.

His slumber went on undisturbed, no dreams, no visions of nakedness, and for once, no nightmares. When his alarm sounded, Billy opened his eyes and found out why. Teddy had slipped into his bed, which in itself was fair game because Billy hadn’t said anything about where he should sleep the night before. There was an arm over his waist and another just over his head, almost like the beginning of a wrestling pose, that, or Teddy was trying to protect him from imaginary bed monsters.

There was no pressure, no mad need for sex in the morning or rush of release before he went to his job. For the first time in years, Billy didn’t want to leave his bed and look for the privacy of being on his own. He hit the snooze button, and told himself he was not snuggling up to Teddy.

Teddy woke him up what seemed like minutes later with a loud snore, and he jumped into wakefulness, chancing a look at his clock. He found that he’d managed to push the snooze button so far in, that it had sort of stuck, and stolen half an hour away from him. The rush came in then, as he ducked from under Teddy’s arms and dashed to his closet to get ready for work.

He scribbled a note to Teddy then was on his way.

Billy spent his entire working hours, thinking about Teddy and what he still needed to do about their semi-relationship at the moment. Teddy’s sleeping face, the realization that he didn’t want their play at cohabitation to end. He’d even found the way Teddy now snored to be precious, and had to stop himself from letting out weird cooing sounds while in the middle of work.

What if he was rushing this too much? What if, and this he hadn’t even asked about while jumping right to convenient conclusions, what if Teddy wasn’t coming back to stay?

When he came back home to change before he left again for classes, Teddy was nowhere in sight. Billy made sure to check for notes, to turn every tiny corner in his tiny apartment, but there was no sign of Teddy, and his note lay on the floor.

Billy promised himself he wouldn’t panic, not until he came back from his classes that was.


	7. Chapter 7

Upon his –rather hasty- return from college, Billy was relieved to find that there was light coming from his apartment window. He took the stairs two at a time, not wanting to get stuck waiting for an elevator, and was wheezing by the time he got to the door and opened it.

“You’re really out of practice bro.” Billy froze at the sound of Tommy’s voice, Teddy still nowhere in sight.

“We can’t all run like you.”

“Nah, it’s because you’ve got that foul thing clouding your lungs.”

“Tommy does it really matter that much to you?” He closed the door, dropping his bag on the floor “Anyways, where’s Teddy?”

“Yes it does, nice save. What happened to ‘I’m over him’?”

“What happened to just answering my question?”

“I sent him back.”

“Just like that? You avoid me for two days, dump Teddy without a single possession of his on him, and then decide, ‘hey, I’ll just take him back while Billy isn’t here, no sweat’.”

“Pretty much.”

“I know what you’ve been up to, I know you’ve been feeding him every scrap of my personal life for the past five years. Enough so that he even knows where my plates are.”

“You don’t know anything.” Tommy looked pissed, but Billy’s emotions matched him perfectly, anger for anger.

“No? Because guess what? I’m tired of hearing this, of being left in the dark like some caged animal all of you are afraid of letting out in case he goes wild, in case  _I_ go wild. I’m tired of pretending I don’t know. You may think you’re all that discreet and more Tommy, but I’ve known since the first day you walked back into my hospital room just what kind of deal you’d cut with the Avengers.”

Tommy’s entire body went still, eyes bulging out, his short nails digging into his thighs. “I..”

He needed to say it, if Teddy could barrel through exposing himself to the pain of truth and rejection, he needed to do it too. He just hoped that like him, Tommy would still stay when all was said. “I trusted you. I thought, if there was anyone whom I could trust with my life, it was you. I didn’t want you to leave me behind and move on.”

Tommy’s eyes were downcast now, and Billy couldn’t stand seeing Tommy like that. It occurred to him that it was different with Teddy, and Tommy was like his half, he was someone Billy could never give up on, he almost wanted to take it all back. “As long as you stayed, it didn’t matter what you’d take in exchange, because you’re my brother.”

Billy hugged him, sitting next to him on the couch now. Tommy didn’t say a word, still itching bruises onto his skin. It was a long time before Tommy finally let go of his pants, and slowly leaned his head under Billy’s. Billy kissed the top of his head, mumbling ‘You’ll always be my big brother.’

When both of them were calm again, and Billy could pretend that Tommy never cried and was a manly straight man made of steel and so, exhibited no emotions, they donned the position they were most used to.

To Billy, it felt like his couch was getting more action than it’d see in all his years living in the apartment, that and more emotional breakdowns than a Jane Austen novel.

“Yours ears need cleaning.”

“Your lungs need washing.”

“Whatever. Wana tell me the real reason you sent Teddy away?”

“Not telling, I’m not a double agent.”

“Sure you are, unless you want a real taste of what my uncontrolled and erratic magical anger could do to your handsome person. Hypothetically speaking.”

“Why thank you. The answer is still: No.”

“I’d hate to ruin a pretty face.”

“You think I’m pretty?”

“Sure, if I were a narcissist, I’d totally date you.”

“Teddy’s in your bedroom.”

“Haha. Nice try.”

“He really is. We got his stuff back from home, but he didn’t appreciate my awesome fully paid round trip and hurled in a garbage can outside. He’s been sleeping off the lag since then.”

“And thanks to all this racket, he’s also up now.”

Teddy’s face was right next to his, and Billy didn’t dare look at it, keeping his eyes fixed on Tommy’s, who was smirking at him from his lap.

Billy had a feeling that he was really out of his league with the two of them as a combined force. He didn’t even need to wonder about it, because in the next moment, it had happened, team Double T.

“So, Teddy and I have been discussing this, and we came up with this really great theory we want to run by you.”

“Excuse me? I came up with this, all you did was try to knock me out so I wouldn’t be able to say it first.”

“Quiet you. How ungrateful, after all those dirty little favors you asked me for.”

Billy, who was sitting across from the two, looked absolutely horrified.

“Billy, don’t pay him any mind.”

“Underwear Billy used to wear, Billy’s current measurements, ah, and of course, the elusive question of whether he’d kept anything you gave him. Couldn’t begin to find out about that one.” Tommy took one look at Billy’s now flaming face, and smirked. “Well that answers that question, doesn’t it?”

Billy stood up, his long fringe falling into his eyes. “I need to get a drink, anyone want one?” He stormed off before he’d even heard their responses, barely squeaking out his own.

Teddy whispered to Tommy in a low angry voice. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

Tommy, unfazed, replied sweetly, aiming to set off Teddy’s anger more. “I have no idea what you mean. It was just a harmless ice-breaker.”

Billy showed up again, breaking their hushed conversation, glasses of water sitting on the table now.

“Uhem. Guys, can either one of you get to the point?” Billy coughed again into his hand, hiding his earlier awkwardness.

Teddy took over the discussion, much to Tommy’s annoyance.

“I think there’s a way to get your magic back, but it’s only through you experiencing the same trigger that set them off in the first place. We have a plan on what that might be.”

With the actual topic of discussion out, both Tommy and Teddy could tell that Billy was not impressed. Not even the least bit.

“No. This is not negotiable. No.”

 “But Billy, this could change everything for you!”

“It’s just an option to consider. There’s no harm in trying, right?”

“It is an option, I just considered it, and the answer is  _no_.”

“What are you so afraid of?” Teddy’s question was something Billy expected, it was a fundamental aspect of the Teddy he’d always known, the one who pushed him to do things he’d always thought were beyond him. Teddy was also making a familiar face to a few days before.

“I understand you might feel guilty about me losing my powers, even a tiny bit, but I’m not up for this, nor will I be chided into trying it.”

Tommy turned to Teddy and gave him a look, that even to Billy looked like he was communicating something pre-planned.

“I mean it.”

Tommy and Teddy just looked at him with straight faces.

——————————-

Dinner was pizza, curtsey of Teddy’s newly retrieved wallet. Teddy must have ordered every type of pizza on the menu under the guise of nostalgia and cravings. Never ones to turn down free food though, Tommy and Billy encouraged this endeavor of him emptying his wallet, knowing full well that his upset stomach would make him retire early from eating much of them.

Much to Billy’s suspicions, Tommy actually decided to leave them alone, and scurried back home, winking at one of them as he left. For once, Billy wasn’t sure who this gesture was aimed at.

There was a bit of an uncomfortable silence at first, one that invites compulsive nervous laughter, Billy tried to beat the cliché out of his system by putting the extra boxes of pizza away. There had been a lot of them.

Teddy was moving around, going in and out of the room, occasional sounds of a zipper being pulled could be heard. Billy having still not noticed Teddy’s suitcase could only mean one thing, that Teddy was bluntly announcing at that moment that he was staying in the bedroom, no questions or buts about it.

Billy treaded carefully around the subject. Sure he didn’t entirely mind if Teddy jumped into bed with him. Who was he kidding? He didn’t mind at all, in fact, the single most occurring train of thought in his head, had something to do with a certain box in his bathroom, and Teddy without clothes.

He told himself these were perfectly normal thoughts considering his age, orientation, and his Teddy fixation.

Also, if Billy hadn’t terribly misinterpreted Teddy’s looks his way and the way they kept ending up locking lips, it also meant Teddy wasn’t averse to the idea, not at all.

He didn’t want to come off as desperate though, sure it was Teddy who was making all these lines of advances, but they were just dragging on, none of them were at the right  _speed_. They’d confessed, most of the hurt and situation was becoming –and fast- water under the bridge, owing to the realization that since then, both have been miserable wrecks and were on equal grounds of hurt and loneliness. If only Teddy would let go of that sense of guilt he had about Billy’s current choices in life.

Heading towards his bedroom, Billy took a look at the sheets, and decided they needed changing. Teddy looked at him briefly, then grabbed a towel and headed out, presumably to the bathroom to shower, if the bottle of conditioner had anything to do with it. Conditioner, apparently one of earth life’s few pleasures.

Billy continued the task, his mind wandering to sea life documentaries, and male fish setting up pretty little homes to seduce the females into mating with them there. He wondered if he had any mints to place on the pillows.

Teddy took forever in the shower, and Billy felt silly for all those little hopes he’d entertained about getting some type of action when he had work and classes the next day. He wore shorts and a t-shirt to bed, and set his alarm an hour early, just in case he needed a surprise cold shower before work.

He kept the side lamp lit for Teddy, got into the bed on his usual side, his back to the door. Minutes later he heard the unmistakable sound of the bathroom door opening and closing, the tap of feet sliding on the floor gaining sound as Teddy got closer to the room.

He didn’t look, trying hard to focus on the green numbers on his digital alarm clock, shivering a little when the covers were lifted and a gust of air slipped in with Teddy’s large frame. Teddy shifted around in bed and Billy felt his heart racing, regardless of how much he reasoned with himself, there was still a spark of anticipation coursing through him. When Teddy stopped moving, Billy reached over and turned off the light, the room was now submerged in darkness.

“Hey, can I ask something?”

“I have work tomorrow.”

“Is that a yes or no?”

“Neither I guess? I can’t promise I’ll give you an answer.” He wondered where Teddy was going with this.

“Why are you so against trying to get your powers back?”

“No comment.”  _Going right there_. Billy resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

“Come on, you can ask me something in return if you answer this one.”

“What could I possibly want to ask you?”  _Except about everything you’ve been doing for the past five years?_

Teddy snorted in the dark. “Like I’d believe that. For example, don’t you want to know what I’m wearing right now?”

“That was such a bad pick up line, I cannot even come up with a counter one. Lame, that’s what you’re wearing, a big giant case of lame.”

Teddy inched closer, his hand going further to touch Billy, once he found Billy’s fingers he pulled them to his chest. Billy, in order not to get a cramp in his arm, turned to face Teddy in the dark. His fingers touched nothing but skin.

“What the heck are you wearing! Don’t tell me there’s nothing on you!”

In response, Teddy just dragged Billy’s fingers lower. Billy panicked, what if? What if Teddy had really slipped in naked? Though it would be hot and all that, but Billy was sure there was some type of protocol that said they had to start with full garb groping before one reconciled nakedly with one’s former boyfriend. Banish the earlier thoughts of getting hot and heavy with Teddy, this was going way too fast now! He tried to pull his fingers away, mental expectations and realistic ones clashing badly. He closed his eyes and curled his fingers.

He touched fabric.

“That was cheap.”

“Better than lame then?” He couldn’t really see Teddy’s face in the dark, but the grin was evident in his words. “Anyways, you lost the question, you need to answer mine now.”

“I didn’t ask anything! It was a statement of shock, very  _rhetorical_. And you didn’t answer with words, even if you did misunderstand me.”

“Okay, I’ll play along. Ask.”

“Fine. Did you date anyone over there?”

Teddy laughed, a rich sound that filled the entirety of the room. It was a sweet seducing sound, pulling on all of Billy’s heart strings and he wished he hadn’t turned off the light so he could witness it. “What? I’m curious.” He was pleasantly amused as well.

“No. Contrary to how Spartan they are, the Kree are as homophobic as one gets. They need to continue feeding a population into the army, so you see where orientation clashes with duty.”

“No gay? Whatsoever? Not even porn of it?”

“I’m not sure about the porn part. It always putt me off to try and find any. Only because they’re a distinctive shade of blue that reminds me a lot of the Smurfs.”

“Smurf porn..Oh God.”  _What an image_. “I’d  _definitely_  want to see that.”

“I’m not surprised, you’ve always had a peculiar taste B, remember? Mixed marriages and all.”

Billy didn’t try hard to keep the sarcasm out of his voice when he replied, “I recall you having one as well.”

There was silence on the other end, and Billy wondered if that was the wrong thing to say. Though there was nothing that could possibly hurt in his statement. He was still puzzling over the sudden death of the conversation when he felt -more than heard- Teddy move.

A second later, Teddy had hooked his leg over Billy’s. It was bare, the hair almost ticklish on his smooth legs.

Billy visited his earlier panic only momentarily, trying to convince himself that a flimsy piece of underwear was really all the protection they needed against this turning into sex.

“Your turn to answer.”

“I..What is your leg doing over here?”

Teddy’s leg moved up and down now, full friction against his. Billy decided they were adult enough to be able to stop this, it must be just harmless teasing, right? He mulled this over while waiting for an answer.

“That’s another question B. If you answer my first one I’ll consider answering that.”

Billy suddenly felt uncomfortable and frowned a little. “Did Tommy put you up to this?” Which he had to admit, would make a lot of sense, but it didn’t hurt less to think that.

Teddy froze, and Billy almost took it as a sign of guilt when he heard the firm, hurt voice of Teddy replying back. “Is this what you think of me? No, Tommy had nothing to do with this. Though unlikely as it may seem to you, I do genuinely care, I do want to help. Not entirely because I feel obliged since I had a hand in wrecking your life, but because I hate seeing you hurt. And it’s plenty obvious you hurt without your powers. It’s plenty obvious you still hurt if everything I seem to do makes you believe I’m trying to manipulate you against your will.”

Teddy withdrew his leg, turning on his side, giving Billy his back and tugging the covers a little as he did so.

“I-”

“It’s okay. Go to sleep, you have work tomorrow.”

It was so silent now. Moments before they were talking, he may have felt like he was being needled into giving answers, but it had felt light, Teddy hadn’t really pushed. It had been nice. He’d ruined it, and Billy couldn’t believe for a second how empty and hollow he’d suddenly felt.

Billy thought of his usual plan of action, to turn his back, let it cool down and leave both their systems, and then apologize in the morning. But this wasn’t Jack, wasn’t someone he needed to force himself to placate so they’d continue to play house with him. He found himself reaching for Teddy’s back, placing his palm on Teddy’s bare shoulder.

Heat radiated off his body. There was no flinch, nor response. Billy wondered if this had been Teddy’s plan all along, then squished that line of thought. That was his problem he guessed, he didn’t feel like he was on stable ground, didn’t feel like he could trust those closest to him because he’d seen across the years and even those few days, how much they’d tried to involve themselves into his life. With or without his consent.

It was a bad sign, and it told Billy exactly what he’d tried to avoid seeing, that neither of the two believed he’d forgiven them, because he couldn’t bring himself to truly trust them again.

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize. I understand.”

“No, I do.” Teddy didn’t say anything at that. Waiting, that was what it felt like to Billy, that Teddy was waiting for him to say what was on his mind, no pressure, no judgment. He should have realized it earlier on, that no matter what had happened, Teddy hadn’t changed beyond recognition, he was still that same boy Billy had known when they were sixteen.

“I’ve been acting like a victim.”

“That’s no-”

“No. Please let me finish.” The ensuing quiet told him what he needed. “You’re right. It’s not easy to believe right away that anything you say has no ulterior motive. It’s not even about grudges anymore, I  just feel like there’s…there’s no room to stop you or my family from hurting me. I know everyone keeps thinking of what’s best for me, one some level I acknowledge that, I know that, I can trust that I will survive that, but I’m scared, I’m utterly afraid of what it’ll do to me. How much more I’ll change beyond recognition to be able to cope with it.” Billy tried not to choke up at his next words, he was doing it, getting things off his chest, he was trusting Teddy to take these, his hurt feelings, his insecurities, and keep them safe.

“Teddy, my magic isn’t gone.” He let it sink in, knowing Teddy wouldn’t stop him, would hold his reply until Billy let him say anything. “It’s there, I’m just consumed by fear of it, of using it ever again. All I think about is that once I finally convince myself I’m not scared of my magic and use it, I’ll set the world on fire. Everyone and everything, and I won’t be able to stop it.”

Teddy didn’t say anything, and now, more than his magic, this lack of sound made all his fears seem valid; he was no longer a hero, an young avenger, someone so consumed by the thoughts of hurting others and letting it happen once he released his magic. He began to withdraw his hand when Teddy shifted again, and was suddenly right on top of him.

For one crazy second, Billy thought Teddy must have fallen asleep in the middle of his speech, and more than relief he felt a pinch of indignation at this.

“Billy, you won’t hurt anyone, you are so far incapable of physically hurting anyone that it borders on sainthood.”

“You’re making this up as you go, you of all people know that isn’t true.”

“Forget what happened in highschool, that was anger, and you had no control because it was all new, you hadn’t been trained. Forget about when we were Young Avengers because it was duty then.”

“Are you going to come up with an excuse for everytime I hurt someone?” There wasn’t much relief in this, that Teddy believed in him. He was getting a little angry at Teddy for making it seem okay to release his powers on the masses.

“No, not again, because next time I’ll be there, I’ll be your shield. I’ll hold you off, I’ll bring it down, I’ll trap you and your flames so far inside me that it won’t touch anyone but me.”

Billy’s shock registered in his body, and waves of something alien seeped into the stream of his body, tingling all his nerve ends in a cold flash of something that felt distinctively like pleasure, but was waves beyond that. It had been a long time since he’d felt it and he’d barely registered it as relief when it managed to flood him.

He didn’t say anything, but Teddy knew what was happening to him. When his arms went limp against pushing Teddy away, when his body sagged from all the tension coiling in his guts leaving him empty. Teddy kept holding him and it was this mix of relief and being held tightly in Teddy’s embrace that gave him his first taste of long lost security. The feeling that if he messed up again, there was someone to back him up, someone who’d make sure he wouldn’t in the first place, who’d keep him in check not because of fear of what he could do, but fear for himself, fear of what it would do to Billy.

Teddy kissed his forehead, then the top of his head. When Teddy’s lips kissed his face, he registered how dry they were against his now damp face. “Tell me. Tell me what you’re feeling.”

“I missed this. I miss you and miss how you can make me feel like I don’t have to drown anymore. I miss making stupid decisions and having my boyfriend come save my ass whether I was in the wrong or not. You were right that night. I took so much of what you were to me for granted..” Teddy kissed him, and Billy tears went unnoticed as they tried to be as close to each other as humanly possible.

As much as they were urgent, the kisses were deep and sweet. Billy’s arms went around Teddy’s neck, and when he noticed how much longer they were to just keep that position they’d used to always fill, he sent one down Teddy’s back, the other inching right into Teddy’s short hair. Teddy’s arms were rubbing his sides, every push sliding his t-shirt up and every exposed strip of skin meeting the equally heated skin of Teddy’s chest and hard abs sliding over his.

He’d seen enough of Teddy’s body to know that being under all this muscle would be every wet dream he had come true, and now it was against his fully, as his shirt was just under his arms. Billy broke the kiss to get some air, and Teddy attacked his neck with a slew of kisses, nipping right behind his ear in a spot that was familiar to them. Billy shivered and his hand slipped to Teddy’s piercings, tracing the distance between them and slipping to trace the inside shape. Teddy bit him then, and Billy grinned, knowing Teddy’s ears were still sensitive to touch.

They were back to kissing, slower this time, Teddy’s tongue swiping the inside of his mouth, rolling over his as Billy tried to quicken the pace. Fingers slipped to his chest, going feather light around his nipples, teasing him with the promise of a real touch soon. He tried to slide down further under the mass of Teddy’s body, the minute his erection met the tent in Teddy’s body, he stopped, and wrapped his legs around Teddy’s. He gasped when Teddy pinched his left nipple in response, arching his back and feeling how aroused they both were. Teddy licked a line from his neck to his right nipple, his hands now creeping up Billy’s shorts, touching him through the fabric of his underwear. Billy groaned, grabbing Teddy’s ass and grinding into him, his other hand pushing Teddy’s mouth closer to his chest.

It was impossible to wait now, he needed more of Teddy’s exposed skin, more of the heat keeping him on the edge. He placed his hand over Teddy’s, the one digging into a point between his thigh and pelvic bone. Teddy’s eyes met his and he nodded once, squeezing Teddy’s hand under his. It took less than a minute for hands to change focus to clothes, Billy’s t-shirt finally off, his shorts and underwear meeting Teddy’s around their ankles. Billy grasped their exposed erections together, rubbing with Teddy grinded into his hands, his body hovering right over Billy’s while he held the weight off with his forearms planted on each side of Billy.

Billy’s hands worked furiously, sliding up and down the heated skin, twisting, applying pressure while his thumbs made the occasional sweep over sensitive heads, carrying them into the edge of release. Billy felt the build up reach an entirely new height, so he tugged Teddy downwards with one hand, meeting him in a kiss, and groaning his release into Teddy’s mouth. It took Teddy a few more stokes to come, traces of his release and Billy’s tracing each of their chests.

 

The sound of harsh breathing filled the air, Teddy kissed the side of his head, pushing himself to Billy’s side to better hold him. Billy’s exhaustion had reached way passed his levels mentally, and in the security of Teddy’s embrace and promise, his heavy eyelids dropped, surrendering to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Not for the last time that week, Billy found that he really didn’t want to leave bed. Suddenly every location outside the immediate confines of his bed was too far. His personal heater, also known as Teddy, was working magical wonders of toasty proportions in the department of warmth.

If it weren’t for the fact that his face felt stiff where his tears had dried, and that he’d already snoozed the living hell out of his alarm clock, he would have stayed exactly where it was warm, cuddly and plain  _nice_. Teddy was snoring softly besides him, and Billy finally took the time to look his full, putting expressions on the slack jaw face in front of him. Teddy’s face the night before, and all those little nuances of emotion on it that he managed to miss in the darkness.

Billy was busy looking at the pattern of short fine golden hairs on Teddy’s chin, touching lightly with his finger, trying to determine if there were there before, of it Teddy had already started to shave in the morning to get them out of the way. When he looked up from Teddy’s lips, he noticed twin blue eyes looking down at him, and a small smile tugged on Teddy’s lips.

“Scratchy.”

“You weren’t complaining yesterday.”

“Hmm..”

“Work?”

“The kids won’t drawn if I’m a bit late today.”

“What happened to the superhero?”

“He’s all snuggled up with his boyfriend. Besides, kids are like cats, they have nine lives. Statistics would say –if they were done- that you’d need to save them from death nine times before anything dramatic would really happen. I bet we kept saving the same mobs of people at one point.”

“Someone’s got their priorities straight.” Teddy’s left eyebrow lifted, though he was still smiling back at Billy.

Billy hesitated for only a minute, then though what the hell, he deserved to indulge in a little bit of privilege. “Come over to the pools with me?”

“Sure.”

“Really? That’s all it takes?”

“Shouldn’t it be enough?”

Billy bent slightly from his position and kissed Teddy. It had been a long time since he’d had one of those mouth aching smiles, but it seemed Teddy was there to give him a permanent case of them.

—————————

He called work, said he’d be a bit late and that he was bringing along a single member of his family. Which was half a lie as far as he was concerned. He got the okay.

There was no time for breakfast, and he promised Teddy something to eat once there were actually there.

“What happened to the shorts you got me?”

“Check the closet? I think I left them there after they were dry.”

Teddy coughed slightly, giving Billy a once over while he was washing his teeth. “What?”

“Would you flip out if I asked you not to wear the booty shorts from last time?” At the sheepish look on Teddy’s face, Billy laughed.

“Those are only for a specific day at the pool, which I am no longer taking shifts for.”

“Good, I don’t think they’re appropriate around kids. It’s like you aren’t wearing anything.”

“That’s the point.” Billy left it in the air whether he meant them being like a second skin, or not kid material. “I could always wear them here. It’s such a waste of resources not to, don’t you agree?” Billy stepped out of the bathroom, looking to see Teddy’s reaction to his teasing, when his own face flamed in embarrassment instead.

“I can see you’re very keen on keeping green. Or red in this case.” Billy’s cape dangled from Teddy’s fingers, suspended in air like it used to before. Teddy just grinned at him.

“Um…we’re going to be very  _very_  late.” And he really really wanted to crawl into a hole somewhere for leaving his little  _memento_  box -if you will-, open for Teddy’s inspection.

“No worries, I have a plan.” Teddy’s eyes almost twinkled with the promise of fun.

———————————-

“You need to eat more, you weight less than a feather!”

“Says the one who grew into a giant Gundam!” Billy tightened his hold on Teddy’s neck. If Hulking was supposed to convey a message of being something akin to a Hulk hatchling, then someone really needed to rename Teddy.

Billy wondered if his newfound fear of heights had anything to do with the fact that Teddy might ‘accidently’ drop him just to test if his magic would kick to save him in or not. But once he’d let go of the fear of that happening –it was hard work trying to trust people again- the feeling of being airborne, resistant to gravity and just flying over his city, was  _fantastic_. He closed his eyes, hearing his clothes flutter in the wind, the rush of slightly cold air on his face and he just breathed it all in.

It felt like moments only had gone by when he opened them and found that Teddy was dropping lower to the ground behind the trees that lined the outside of the building. Once they were both safely on the ground, Teddy unzipped his suit and stuffed it into the gym bag they’d carried with them, squished between Billy and Teddy’s chests. Billy checked the time and found that it had taken them less than two minutes to get there. He had ten more minutes until he actually had to go in within the fifteen minutes they’d spared him at work to be able to make the trip.

Teddy grabbed his hand, revoking Billy’s right to object by looking ahead and pulling him along as he set off towards the gates. Billy wasn’t sure why his cheeks went a dark pink, when his co-workers all knew he was gay and had seen him don less innocent poses. Hell, if they didn’t know, the tiny bikini brief should have set all their alarms a rainbow sort of color. He tried to keep up the pace with Teddy, because he needed to re-introduce him to the guard as family in order to keep up the formality of the favor.

The minute they were past the gate, Billy found himself squished in a hug, three sets of arms going around him. Two around his midsection and one around his back.

“Mom?” He looked up at Teddy, more than a little confused, when he saw him bickering with Tommy. The twin heads from around his middle were the twins, toothy grins on identical faces looked up to his face. Everyone was talking together, voices and sounds mingling together and all he heard were scraps from each conversation.

“..You were such a quiet and obedient child! On the other hand these two have kept me on my toes this entire summer so when Tommy…”

“..We wana go into the pool! Which ones yours?..”

“..We brought water guns! Is there ice-cream?..”

“..I told you not to be late! You ruined the surprise! Altman you fail as a half everything..”

“..It was a slow rising if you catch my drift..” Teddy winked at him from around the noisy crowd that refused to relocate somewhere else until every string of conversation was over. He started moving towards his assigned pools in the hopes that his mob would just naturally follow. Fortunately it worked.

His mom went to get them all something to eat, the twins jumped in the pool and Tommy slid on the nearest chair to suntan to his hearts’ content. Teddy was right between where he sat and where Tommy was, feet dangling in the water, splashing the twins when they came closer.

“So? What really took you that long to get here?”

“We were getting reacquainted. In bed. Speaking of which, that changed too.”

“ _Screw you_  Altman.”

“Teddy!”

“B, he’s just jealous.”

“Yeah? Keep your boyfriend nice and embarrassed and he won’t have enough blood left to get it up.”

“ _Tommy_!”

“He’s still young, it’s more than I can say for you ‘older brother’.”

“Both of you! Cut it out or I’ll have you thrown out!”

“Ungrateful ass.”

“I quite like-” Teddy took one look at Billy’s face and didn’t complete the thought.

 

Aside from Tommy and Teddy’s occasional buttheading, Billy thought this was one of the best days he’d had all year. There was nothing forced in his family’s mannerism, they were happy, almost ecstatic to see him and Billy felt humbled in the knowledge that they missed him more than he’d wanted to let himself believe.

The twins were getting restless by the end of his shift, Tommy and Teddy took them to the showers to change and get ready to leave. It was then that Billy really had a moment with his mom, just the two of them. He hadn’t said anything the entire time, aside from the general chitchat and update on the status of his work and classes and his impending graduation, so it was a surprise when she suddenly told him something he hadn’t really been expecting to hear.

“Take your time and don’t push yourself Billy, in many ways you’re still learning. Don’t be afraid to lean on us once in a while, okay?”. Her hand grasped his, and Billy finally understood that the smile she’d bestow on him was just tinged with worry.

Then it happened.

The twins were racing back towards him, flip-flops squelching with excess water on the slippery tiles of the poolside, one of them turned to look at Teddy and Tommy behind them and didn’t notice the other pushing right in front of him. All Billy could see in that moment was the marble statue with its jagged edges and sharp angles, and how either of the two were no doubt going to crash right into it. He reacted without thinking, his arm shooting forward while his legs hadn’t moved, the word stop at the tip of his tongue.

A blue bubble went around them both, bouncing off the statue and then disappearing with a pop the minute it rebounded away from it.

Billy rushed to see if they were okay, the rest joining him as it was clear they were unharmed, Teddy arriving at his side first.

The twins were fine, one rubbed his bottom where he’d fallen, and other picked himself up and dusted, ready to charge again and start their earlier race. Only then did it occur to Billy just what had happened.

He stared at his fingers, his palms in wonder, and looked to see Teddy with a similar expression on his face. Teddy placed the towel he had around his neck over Billy’s head, covering just enough of it to allow Billy some privacy as tears of relief slid down his face. His mom chastised the boys for running around and almost getting hurt, her voice fading into the background. Tommy gave a thumbs up, then followed her to pick up their bags.

“Its..”

“I know.”

“I’m..”

“Of course.”

“I need..”

“I love you. This is just a plus.”

“I love you too.”

“You free this weekend?”

“Yeah.” Billy refused to call what he was doing, gazing, it was just that Teddy’s eyes were something he could get lost in. A small smile appeared on his lips, he dried his tears with the side of the towel. He felt a slight buzz that he attributed to happiness, excitement and joy, knowing full well it was also his magic.

“I hope you’ll come with me, and meet my family then.”

Billy took in all the little signs, the slight twitching, the way Teddy tried to shuffle his feet without it being noticeable and the little strain in his voice as he said this. His smile didn’t falter, it turned instead into a big wide grin as he said, “Yes.”

When there was an answering smile on Teddy’s lips, Billy kissed him.


End file.
